What the hell is this? Tomy’s My First Band Recording? I think you can actually hear each member of the band remembering what it is they have to do next inbetween each note: “left… finger… third… fret…”
I mean good god, this is one of the dullest nine minutes anyone would ever have to endure. And on reading – you guessed it – the wonderful PR shit that came with this (albeit well packaged) EP I was expecting to be blown away by something that covers the punk and emo bases whilst transcending into a whole host of others genres on the way to Rock God history. Instead I’m presented with a lesson in how to dullify a day to the Nth degree. Whiney, wimpy vocals that sound half stoned most of the time and drumming that sounds like it’s being carried out by a clockwork monkey – yes I know it’s a girl doing it, so someone can accuse me of being sexist or something if they want. It’s not sexist, she’s just not a good drummer. Uninteresting, slow tunes that seem as anaemic as they do uninteresting – there really isn’t much that redeems this record. Oh wait – they’re not fashioncore arseholes, for which they receive a whole extra point. But otherwise it’s just unmitigated shit.
Oh, and kudos for printing it on a black CD kids – my decrepit stereo can barely read discs with strong reflective surfaces, never mind dark ones.
www.purevolume.com/bastien
Ian