Christ alive. Whatever you’re doing right now, put it down and listen to Fallopian, a four piece all girl band from LA. I’m not sure whether this shit is genius or, well, shit. I mean they have songs like ‘Sex With A Tree’ which, amazingly, describes having sex with a tree, and a song called ‘My Thoughts On Boogers’. And yes, that is the American word for bogie.
Some of the songs are so incredibly basic and horrible (‘Free Peepshow’ and ‘Princess Stench’) that I’m not sure if they are as bad as they sound or some kind of kitsch genius. Seriously. Is this shit ironic and the joke’s on me, or are Fallopian the worst band ever to grace this Earth? I honestly don’t know. What I do know, however, is that the girls touch on every single puerile topic you can think of and “sing” and “play instruments” to it. ‘PotaToe Bug’ is some kind of weird spoken word/shouty mess, ‘Check Out My Rash’ goes places where it shouldn’t and they even have the balls (ahem) to cover ‘Great Balls Of Fire’.
Go listen, even if it’s just to check if I’m insane.